Thursday, August 3, 2006

Poll Results: Who You Hate

The new poll did not bring in as many respondents as the old poll. I do not know why. Perhaps it has something to do with its utter pointlessness. The question was "Who Do You Hate?" and you were only allowed to hate one thing.

I don't know how to say this, so I'll just say it. I am very disappointed in all of you. It is understandable that you hate Rapists, Murderers, and Adolf Eichmann, but one of you actually stated that you hate America! How could you? America never hurt anyone, ever! You bastard. You killed Kenny.

And then there were you psychos who stated that you hate Rainbows. Why? WHY? I love rainbows. They are my friend. They are pretty and nice I like them I'm hungry I have to go to the bathroom are we there yet are we there yet?

Nobody hated Whitey, General Pinochet, or Mohandas Gandhi. I don't understand how you could place them in the same category. Whitey has suppressed blacks, and Pinochet has killed thousands and thousands of his political opponents, but Gandhi was all, "An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind." He was a total pacifist. So it makes sense that you don't hate him, but you don't hate Whitey and Pinochet? Oh well. I guess polls don't lie, so I guess we have arrived at a consensus on the similarities between Whitey, Pinochet, and Gandhi.

Many hated "Other", whoever that is. You people probably hate squirrels. That's my best guess.

Your responses were truly revolting and disheartening, but given the choices, the last person or group of people I would have thought you would hate the most are the Telemarketers. In fact, the plurality of voters hate Telemarketers more than anybody on the planet, apparently. You hate them even more than Pinochet, who, as I stated above, nobody seems to hate. I mean that is just wrong. My girlfriend is a telemarketer, OK? I suppose you think I should send her to some International War Crimes Tribunal now. She's just doing her job, OK? Stop hatin' on my girlfriend! Look, she's crying. Hope you're happy.

You sick fucks.

Results of "Who Do You Hate?"

15 voters

America 6.7%
Whitey 0.0%
Rapists 13.3%
Murderers 13.3%
Rainbows 13.3%
General Pinochet 0.0%
Adolph Eichmann 13.3%
Mohandas Gandhi 0.0%
Telemarketers 26.7%
Other 13.3%